Communication blues

And here, dear readers, is a 2016 post on communication that I find still relevant today.

How many times do I have to repeat myself?

How many friends, submissive friends, have I listened to while they told me their story of breakup and heartache and how that left them vulnerable?

Yes, a Domme can have submissive friends and not consider them potential collarees.

No it isn’t usual, but that’s how the dice roll with this particular Domme.

A friend of mine told me about her breakup with her on and off Mistress of the past 10 years. This person has been under the influence of her (now ex-Mistress) for a long time. It surprises me how when questions were raised the attitude was to not answer them or punish her.

Let me put it as bluntly as I can without being profane.

Communication is a two-way street.
Communication is a two-way street.
Communication is a two-way street.

Message drilled in yet? Write that 4000 times or until your hand hurts, whichever comes first.

When a sub asks questions, it is legitimate and necessary to answer them. It is not an encroachment on the Dom / Domme’s power, and it is certainly not topping from the bottom.

It is our job, our responsibility as dominants to care for those who submit to us. Care ceases to be care when doubts are not answered, or the sub is punished for asking questions. Questioning, having a mind is an inherent part of humanity.

If you want an unquestioning thing always at your beck and call, get a rubber doll. No, not a rubber dolly, I was a rubber dolly in my sub days and it’s one of the hardest things you can possibly be regarding objectification. I speak of the adult item. Yes, the inflatable one. You have assumed the responsibility of caring for someone, then assume it fully and that for goddamn sure includes sharing and disclosing what you do and his or her questions. Otherwise… Otherwise, you’re just being an ass-hat.

There. I said my piece.

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